Time

Where has time gone.?

I think about this from time to time. It seems like just yesterday I was a kid doing all kinds of kid things. I can remember elementary shcool, jr. high, high school, but for some reason I have a harder time with college.

Whenever I think back on college it seems so blurry. Perhaps it is just the protective instinct of my mind kicking in to protect me from whatever happened that I shouldn't remember. I am not sure, I just know that so much of it seems like it never happened.

I know that I took some classes but I don't remember much of the content. I know that I worked a few jobs but I don't remember my boss' names. I even dated a girl or 2 but hardly remember them any longer....or at least it doesn't seem like they really had a very significant place in my memory after the experience.

The only thing that I really do remember are the people. However, only a certain small number of them come to mind. Most of them were my peers, of whom many I still keep in contact with. Some were my professors, of whom I don't keep as close contact with.

College only lasted 2 years for me and I didn't know what the hell I was doing. I did poorly in the classes that I didn't care about and well in the classes that were easy. I didn't know how to manage time, money, assets, people, circumstances, etc. If I had it all to do over again I probably would, but I would do it better now that I know the difference.

College was only about 7 years ago for me, and yet it seems like an eternity. I often wonder what has become of my old drummer, my old girlfriend, that guy that I got to know for that brief few months my freshman year before he dropped out. At the same time I also have been able to just let all that go. I live in the now.

I have come to believe that time is just an illusion of sorts. It only exists in the perceived reality. I mean, after all, 1 week could last forever for one person and fly by for another. There is really nothing static about it other than what we have molded into that which exists naturally; namely the rotation of the earth around the sun and the amounts of light and darkness asssociated with each cycle.

I do know that even though I have given up on time, that life is still but a vapour. Here today and gone the next. That is the reality of the grand scheme of things. We have to do our best while we have the "time."